save a horse, ride a Schwinn bike

I biked to work this morning. 19 hilly miles, one way. It's a thing I do now and then when the weather is nice and I feel energetic.
I meant to ride 19 miles the other way too, but after just a few miles I found this shiny piece of glass.
It's pretty, but I think I'd like it better somewhere other than lodged in my rear tire.

I called DJ, who drove to rescue me and my gimp bike. While waiting for him I took pictures of the sky, which was doing the wonderful midwestern thing that is best described as lowering.

It is good to go places under my own steam, and very good to have the option of rescue.

how it is

Today was my dog's second birthday.

We had steak.

He gets the bones.

the bride's side

(also at EAD)

I’m not inviting my dad to the wedding. Let alone having him walk me down an aisle. He’s alive, well, and lives two miles away. But if he shows up uninvited, the ushers are also bouncers.

He was by all appearances a good dad. He went to work five days a week, church on Sundays, and seemed perfectly normal. Unless you lived with him, and then it was no good at all.

When I was in college, circumstances changed and it seemed worth another chance. Which did not go all that well. So I changed a few more things and for some time we maintained the kind of Christmas and Thanksgiving relationship that sort of gets you out of being a complete orphan.

Two years ago DJ and I moved in together, and three months after that my dad failed again, this time with my little brother. He was eighteen at the time, so when my dad called to tell me that the kid was homeless, I was absolutely concerned. Crying in frustration and anger, concerned.

But really, this isn’t a story about my dad at all, or even my brother. It’s about DJ. He handed me a Red Stripe and asked what we could do. We. What we did was bring my brother to live with us, and for a year and a half DJ was as generous as he would have been with his own brother. Maybe more. More than anyone would have expected. It was enough to get my brother on his feet, with savings and a plan and (still) a key to our house. DJ has never once made anyone feel bad about this; it was just the thing to do and we did it.

My dad, by the way, has never admitted the utter crappiness of his actions. Or thanked either of us for pinch-hitting as parents, to the possible detriment of our relationship. (We were actually pretty good, and our relationship hasn’t seemed to suffer.) So my dad is out of chances. DJ is very diplomatic. If there are sides, he is always on mine. I know he thinks the current plan in the best one, but if I changed my mind he’d support that too.

That “for better or for worse” thing is no joke. Things can get worse and worse and worse, until you can’t remember when things were better. It’s really good to have someone to hand you a Red Stripe and get to work on a solution. It’s really good to be on the same team.

couple of the year

Over the weekend DJ and I met Kim of Bowtie Photography for engagement photos. (Even though the engagement is well underway, might as well enjoy it while we can.) We met in a cute Indiana town (Plymouth), about halfway between us.

She posted this photo as a teaser. Wow. Welcome to my beautiful and slightly weird fairy tale! I love it.
That's what DJ and I look like now. All headless and plastic. But my, aren't we thin?

what I did on my spring vacation

Bridesmaid Chloe came to visit this weekend, in my newly painted and curtained guest room. I had Maid of Honor Katie move in too, even though she lives just a suburb or two away. It seemed easier that way, with all the accessories and hair products that needed sharing.

We got manicures and pedicures.

We went shopping. This is my great find - an ABS Allen Scwartz dress for $40, originally $228. Love you, Nordstrom's Rack. Belt from Target, recently purchased for $4.97. Can't beat that.

We also went to a club which ended up being unexpectedly eurotrashy and surreal. At least for me, but I was both a tad allergy-ill and the designated driver. So maybe my experience was atypical.

It was fun. The next time I see C. it will be September and she'll have a birthday and DJ and I will have a wedding. That will be fun too.

I never plan my outfits this far in advance

I had a post all ready, but just before publish I realized that Bridesmaid Chloe is visiting this weekend (so excited!), and I might not have time to write Sunday's EAD post between now and then. So I cut and pasted and moved it over into the Sunday queue, and I suppose this is what happens with cheating. At first you think you can maintain both your relationships, then eventually you slip and give earrings to the wrong blog.

But then I realized that I do have something. In two weekends DJ and I are driving into Indiana to meet Kim. For DJ, this is his first time actually meeting Kim. She's going to take pictures of us, and I am going to try not to make stupid faces. A few days ago we were e-mailing back and forth about outfit ideas, and this was the winner in the Flirty Dress category. Casualwear is still to be determined, and I have no idea what DJ will wear.

We decided on the khaki wedges, by the way. And this cardigan in navy, for closeups and chilly weather and preppiness.

primp & preen

The natural look is not all that natural. Everyone except DJ can check out my horrifying list of helpers at EAD today. DJ, I just look like this! It's amazing, right? Also, I have a bridge in Brooklyn...

oh, THAT color? really?

Today DJ had a work thing, and I was invited. But I didn't really want to go, so instead I stayed home and shampooed our carpets. I practice avoidance/procrastination in odd ways.

I need to call my mom and ask her if this is her fault somehow.

The carpets really needed to be cleaned, though. I don't know if I should feel good (about cleaning them) or bad (about them needing it so badly.)

dresses and taxes

On Tuesday I wrote a draft post for EAD about bridesmaids' dresses, to be published today. Last night I did my taxes. I have my priorities. You don't want to read my tax return (snore) but you might want to read the part about Bridesmaid C.'s rack.

tall and taller

These are my brothers. Both younger, both taller. And that is saying a lot. We are a tall family.

They are going to walk me down the aisle. One on each side, like a hustle maneuver. I am counting on the broad comedy to keep me from sobbing my face off.

The left (younger) one lived with DJ and me for a while. He's a good kid, and although he lives practically across the street now I often miss him.

The right (older) one is graduating from college in a few weeks. He was home from school a few weeks ago and my mom found this teeny tiny bowtie he used to wear when he was a baby, which he obligingly modeled. Things are taller now.

I'm lucky to have them. I don't have much of a dad, and although I'm willing to walk myself I like it better this way.